I wait for life to get better, because you told me so.
I watch them with their masks on. Each mask different from the other – cynicism,dishonesty, excessive criticism, hypocrisy, pretence and cheap praise. I recognise when they lie or want to manipulate. I watch quietly as friends who I once trusted, turn into foes. I tolerate their behaviour and keep moving forward.
I keep moving, because you told me so.
For the very same reason, I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. I witness something violent, but feel helpless. I hate conflict and comparisons. As I keep moving forward, certain that you are hiding just round the corner, I get kicked back with full force. I brush off the dust, because I recall that you warned me about this. I am in terrible pain, but I believe you with all my faith. Loyalty, stronger than blood.
I keep moving forward because you told me so.
You tell me that people are capable of doing what they dream of. But my life hardly seems to improve, get better. I am left with nothing but my dreams. They have been with me, from the beginning of me. I feel like a prisoner of my personal history. I drink down my sorrows and let it go. My life is going to end before it even starts.
And, now you tell me. After all these years. Now you tell me, I don’t have to?