“It is our choices that define who we truly are. Our ability to do something follows thereafter.”
I just happened to ponder over this sentence, today. There is a hidden meaning behind this sentence, I believe. Some kind of a secret. Like an answer to life. Almost riddle-like. When we choose to do something, we work towards it. But isn’t ‘choice’ and ‘ability’ inter-related? Almost like an infinity symbol.
This, further makes me wonder whether I have made the right choices for myself. ‘Right’ in the sense, that I hope I have made the choices that I ought to, which doesn’t break boundaries or a wrong decision that I might later regret. And regret is something I don’t want.
I wonder why it is that I keep wanting some people back in my life. Why, all of a sudden, after years they show up; right outside your doorstep with the most beautiful smile that you’ve ever known (for quite sometime). It makes you want to re-do every conversation that you’ve ever had. Makes you feel hopeful that people do, after all, come back. But wait. No. Reality hits hard. It tears you apart when they get back to you and you realize that it’s not the same, after all. They’ve changed or perhaps circumstances have changed them. They are no longer the person they used to be. Or maybe, they pretend to be someone they always wanted to be. It’s not that you don’t want to maintain the relation you had with that person. You most definitely do. You scream within for all the love. It’s a mutual feeling. Each person feels the exact same thing for the other.But now, something comes in between. Ego? Yes? The cruel world has changed them, somehow. It has made them cold-hearted, indifferent. It has changed them in such a way that what they once called ‘love’ , they now doubt the very existence of the word. And love, my friend, can never be tested. Loyalty can be tested. But, not love. For love is…
Love is something we are all born with. Love is something that I am unaware of. Some just forget in their life-journey what love feels like. It takes someone really special to remind them that they were simply born with it. Some realise it, some don’t, some accept it whereas, there are those who know about it all along but still doubt its existence. They require a miracle and lot of chances to feel it. To rekindle that feeling of love that they once felt very, very long ago. They go through so many hardship in life that it’s not even funny, anymore.
People like that are hard to find. And once found, you will notice that they don’t leave your life easily. I mean, you might not talk to them at all, but they are there.You can feel their presence. All the time. They want to help you, show you the right path, guide you and who knows, maybe even love you back?! But it takes time. All the hard feelings they have bottled up inside them, will melt away…slowly…one layer after the other. And guess what?- You will. Because you wouldn’t have started it in the first place. You wouldn’t be reading it right now. You want it, Somewhere, deep down, in your heart.
Once the door has been opened, one feeling will follow the other. It’s like an over flowing jar of M & M’s: Out spills every bit, each a different color, a different feeling.
And guess what’s common? – They’re all sweet.
Copyright Snehal Rawal, 2015.